Finding love is not just about finding the perfect partner — it’s about creating and sustaining a happy, healthy, meaningful relationship. As a Relationship Specialist I have worked with many different couples, and I found that the happiest couples, or the couples who are willing to do what it takes to succeed in their relationships, are the ones willing to do the following:
Things Happy Couples Do Differently
When it comes to the differences that make a relationship work and not work there are 7 things happy couples do differently. In a previous blog post I talked about the 6C’s that make for a healthy relationship. However, in order for a relationship to stand the tests of time, the best relationships are not about the good times. They are also about these 7 things that happy couples do differently: Take a look!
Their Actions Consistently Back Up Their Claims of Love
Actions speak louder than words. Therefore, one of the things happy couples do differently is be consistent with what they say and what they do. For instance, happy couples believe in showing one another the love they claim to have for one another, rather than just saying, “I Love You.” Since words are empty and meaningless without actions, they believe in backing up what they say with their behaviors. Bottom line: Couples who’s behaviors mirror what they say, spend less time in disagreements.
Happy Couples Focus on What They Like About Each Other
Energy flows where attention goes. Therefore, another thing happy couples do differently is focus on what they like about each other. Often when couples are not getting along they argue and point out the things they do not like about the other person. However, couples that know the importance of focusing on what they like about each other, do not spend more time focusing on the negative things in their relationship, but rather the things they love about their partner. Bottom line: Couples that focus on what they love about their partner, get more of what they love about their partner.
They Don’t Beat Around The Bush
Another thing that happy couples do differently is they don’t beat around the bush. If they have a pressing issue they need to discuss they do not wait until it builds up inside to discuss it. Or, if they want to do something or do not want to do something, they say it. Happy couples value one another’s time, thus they don’t waste each other’s time pretending to be someone they are not. Nor do they compromise their happiness for the sake of the relationship. Bottom line: Learn to speak up!
They Respect Each Other’s Humanness
In spite of our imperfections we are whole, perfect and complete beings. That said, another thing happy couples do differently is acknowledge their right to make errors and mistakes. Most people live under the illusion that they will meet this perfect person that will do and say all the right things. When the reality is no one can do or say everything right according to another persons expectations. Happy couples recognize that they have to communicate their wants, needs and requirements to their partner. And, they realize that their partner may fall short in some instances. Bottom line: Couples that recognize the value of demonstrating love, patience and communication will have a better chance at solving their grievances and getting their needs met.
They Open Up to Each Other, Especially In Trying Times
The hardest thing to do is open up to someone you’re angry with. However, happy couples open up about their needs and requirements, and do not expect their partners to be mind readers. Often, particularly when we are angry, we fall short of expressing our feelings and concerns to our partners. Bottom line: It is our responsibility to communicate what we need and what we want in order to get our needs met.
They Make Plenty Of Time For One Another
In a busy world it is not always easy to make time for the people we love. However, happy couples recognize that they must spend quality time with one another to keep a connection. When we are busy with work, the kids, or life in general, often the thing that suffers the most are our relationships. We spend less time actively listening to our partners, thus foregoing the time to value what it is our partners are sharing or trying to say. Bottom line: the couples that put in quality time, spend a lifetime of happiness together.
They Meet In The Middle And Work Together
The most meaningful journey you will take in your relationship is meeting your partner halfway. Some people spend all their time and energy trying to win an argument or be right. However, happy couples recognize that working with their partner, rather than alone or against them, achieves more peace within the relationship than friction. Bottom line: Couples that have the ability to work as a team, conquer the world together.
Share Your Experience
These are a just few of the things that happy couples do differently. However, if you and your partner have other things to add to the list of things I shared, please share yours by emailing me at info@findinghappily.com
